No victims

I’m sick. Terrible head cold. But life goes on..& it goes on and on and on. I’m completely distracted with my issues; head cold, work, parental responsibilities and homemaking. I know it sounds ridiculously silly..but Im obsessed with my rather simple issues. The problem with this is that when I focus on my issues I miss what is going on around me with the people I love. It is so easy to get obsessively consumed with our “problems”. I feel bad that my family members have to succumb to my situations. Marriage in particular can easily become a situation of, who has a harder life. It gets competitive.  We get into annoying situations that require compromise, work and acceptance yet we choose to compete about who has a harder road. Today I am ashamed, I became obsessed with having to take care of all of the parenting duties while my hubby was totally immersed in a situation with a close relative on their death bed. I insisted on him going to visit his uncle. However, as the day unfolded and the circumstances got hard I felt sorry for myself. I lashed out at him for tending to his obviously, more important, needs. I could not see past MY day and the struggles I was enduring…even though they were tiny compared to his. I was sick, tired and bored, but I was not dealing with an important life event..like a significant family member deteriorating. So the point of this blog is to say, Look outside your issues. There’s always someone with a tougher struggle. Be grateful! Furthermore, marriage can cause us to act like competitive siblings when situations get tough. That’s ugly & common. We are not much different than kids. We get stuck in our personal experiences and we fight for our rights. It backfires though… Our spouses likely have just as tough a load to carry. I’ve come to the conclusion that it is so much easier to be noncompetitive, Yes Life sucks! but we can fake a smile in the tough times. It’s necessary and productive because there are so many people walking a tougher walk. Chin up friends…Be Positive!

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