Life is forcing itself on me

unpredictable

Recently life has been teaching me the lesson, just let it go!….even if I don’t want to. I think the deletion of my Facebook account has officially run its 14 day reconsider phase. Deciding to permanently remove myself from Facebook was not my initial intention. I would occasionally deactivate it for a break, but I would get back on within a week clamoring for an easy connection. Then one day I was struck with insight. I realized that I had turned this distracting entertainment into a compulsive and very important part of life. Anyhow, after 2 weeks, I barely think about it until someone reminds me of my absence… I cringe at the thought of rejoining. Perhaps, one day…minus at least 200 “friends”. 

Another stupid seemingly important loss…my dishwasher! Omgoodness! I thought I was going to die. We’re doing a long term simple kitchen remodel. It makes no sense to replace the dishwasher until other things are completed. Again, I thought I was going to die of pruny hand syndrome. Certainly, it can’t be good to stand at the sink looking into a beautiful back yard while mindlessly washing dishes. Actually, after 2 months of feeling sorry for myself washing dishes for a family of 5, I actually enjoy this time. No one intrudes on dishwashing. It’s not a stimulating activity, unless you’ve been doing it for a while. Then it’s peaceful. 

These examples along with a few more circumstances of “loss”…I won’t bore you!…washing dishes is probably like watching paint dry if you have a dishwasher. Here, life is teaching me a lesson.  Half the crap I care about doesn’t matter after a period of disconnection. We are where we are because we need the lessons of now in our lives. Sometimes we need to step out and connect & other times we need to withdraw & retreat to our personal base self. Sometimes we need to move quickly and just survive with the pace of life.  Then other times, life forces us to stand at the kitchen window, washing dishes, so we can contemplate our life, quietly. Hmm! Alone in peace, I ponder words, writing, music, spirituality, wisdom, gardening. Alone, without influences, the sky is the limit in my solitude. 

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